There are so many things we can be and do in this life. The choices can be exhilarating, frustrating, intoxicating, regretful, and freeing. We live in South Tampa, Florida in the United States of America, the land of the free. Do we have too much freedom? If we have choices, who can we blame other than ourselves?
Oh you would be surprised how many people spend their days complaining and blaming everyone else for their problems. The situations that we are in are a direct result of us and us alone. When we were children and in the early stages of emotional development many of our decisions were made for us. Hopefully for the sake of our safety or wellbeing. However, as adults we are in the driver’s seat. Each decision affects the next and some affect us for years to come. For example, to become a parent or not is a life changing decision. Some females allow a reckless thoughtless act to decide for them. Some carefully plan year by year and meticulously choose their partner. Some wait until the last minute as a last chance saloon and accept the first guy that saddles up. Pregnancy lasts for 9 months and motherhood lasts forever. The concept of caring for another human being, being in charge of everything for them, is daunting. So daunting a careless slip of a penis with no condom is mind blowing. The amount of emotional and spiritual maturity it takes to raise a being, to influence their thoughts and beliefs is insurmountable. Are we ever perfectly prepared for anything? No but starting at a place where you are carrying a child that may be born with fetal alcohol syndrome because you can’t stop drinking for 9 months is a decision with serious ramifications. You have greatly affected someone’s future by every single decision you’ve made. The mothers job is large beyond measure even stemming to the partner she chooses to drop their seed.
What kind of a father would you like for your child? A hard worker who is an addict, abusive, and a womanizer? An intelligent one who is absent and cold? Is it possible to choose a perfect partner? Absolutely not, nobody is perfect. Two people may be more suitable for each other, more in sync with each other. And thoughtful preparedness is key to parenthood. When you purchase a car you do some research. Google what you type of engine you need, size of the car, make and model. You may drive one prior to buying, take some more time to decide before the final purchase. A new car may last around 10 years, more or less. A child lasts forever. Getting pregnant like ordering a sandwich seems to be the new norm. There are shows that highlight pregnant teens, it’s no longer a taboo subject where they’re sent away. They even gain some fame and make some money for doing the shows making it acceptable.
The first limb of yoga is “yama” which refers to restraint, moral discipline, and moral vow. There are five yamas:
- Ahimsa=non violence
- Asteya=non stealing
- Brahmacharya=right use of energy
- Apiragraha=non greed or non-hoarding
Restraint, moral discipline, and moral vow; we have a moral obligation to not harm another. It’s through the practice of yoga that we step into our body and soul. We connect to ourselves, our desires, our passions. It gives us a unique opportunity for self-reflection and the ability for transformation. The decision to have a baby could have been as simple at the age of 21 as we wanted a likeness of our self. However, with emotional maturity and a deep spiritual practice we could discover that this was a selfish need that no longer serves us. Running after what society tells us to do may not be the answer for everyone. Some have a burning desire coupled with a deep yoga practice and sound decision making. Not everyone is meant to be a parent in the traditional form. Perfectionism is the opposite of accomplishment because you will never get to the destination and always be berating yourself. However, mindful preparation and thoughtful consideration are realistic goals. Yoga is for the child who endured the abuse of a parent who wasn’t ready and for the person who is teetering on such a large decision. Grateful we are that yoga offers us a window into ourselves like no other. Utilize this beautiful gift, the gift of discovery.
Written by Kristen Carla Blogger/Acupuncture Physician www.facebook.com/kristencarla
Kodawari Studios 3965 S. Henderson Blvd., Suite C, Tampa, Fl 33629